Anxiety is a bully. It controls me. Belittles me. It holds you back from new opportunities. Knocks your voice down. It makes you constantly put yourself down. Its part of you. It’s a bully.
Anxiety comes in many shapes and forms. Slowly taking over. Controlling your thoughts, your actions and you physical status. The physical effects of a mental illness are massively underestimated or never even never thought about. It’s a bully. Mentally and physically. You slowly begin to loose yourself, dropping back silently. Your old self trapped in the back. Anxiety is a bully.
But you must always remember that however lost someone can be, there’s always a way back. It will take time, and you’ll get lost gain along the way. There’s ups and downs. Recovery isn’t perfect. I don’t know what my future will be, but I know that it can only get better. I will hold bright days but also dark days. At times I’ll drift back to the past, taking a few steps back on the way. But steps can be taken forward.
Not every chapter is meant to be perfect. But you’ve not finished the book, “it may not have such a happy beginning”. It is and will be temporary. A chapter always ends. And another will always begin.
The bully at a stage will always stop. But it takes your confidence and positivity to come through first. Your not your mental illness, it may be attached to you, but your so much more than that.
The weight of the world might be a little heavier right now, just remember that things can and will get better. But for now, keep doing your best – that’s all anyone can ask.
Amy’s Blog 