I just wish I didn’t disappoint you when I can’t love myself. When I can’t be happy. When I can’t eat. When I can’t sleep. When I can’t take care of me.
Because now I have two things inside me screaming. One is telling me that I’m failing myself and the other is that I’m failing you.
And I’m tired. Not the sleep kind of tired. The tired that lives in your bones and weighs more than your body down. That grey cloud casted above.
What I mean is that sometimes I’m not the star, but the darkness that surrounds it. But I have to understand – to be a star you must burn.
Everybody has a chapter we don’t want to read out loud. And although I can’t seem to understand what’s going on in my life right now. Whether I’m getting better or worse. Whether I’m sad, angry or stressed. What to say and what to do, or even what to feel. I know there is hope.
I know there is a chapter I will want to read aloud. And to understand that I am not disappointing. I’m trying my best, and my best is good enough.
With each step you’ll make it there, you’ll shine that little bit brighter. And to know to be a star, you have to burn.
